You will notice as I write these blogs that I always talk about “we”– “we were in the hospital,” “we are learning to live with xxx.” I don’t mean to minimize that Lynn is the one with MS and he is the one who ultimately has to deal with the frustrations, pain, discomfort and significant changes in his life, but he was not diagnosed with MS alone, WE were.
What happens to him happens to me. When he can’t move, I move for him. When he needs information, I get it. If he needs equipment, I find a way to get it. If he gets upset, I deal with the emotions. If he wants to get from point A to point B, I get him there. So Lynn is not the only one with MS; I have it too. I live with the frustration of being housebound most of the time. I live with the fact that he needs to be catheterized every two hours so I can’t go away for long. I live with being interrupted every few minutes all day and night to help him do what he needs to do. My life is no longer my own–my life is now dedicated to making his better and bearable.
So if you wonder why I refer to everything that happens to him as if it happens to me too….it does. Just in a different way, but I have MS too.